It didn't start off amazingly. Monday was actually pretty horrendous. I dealt with it by watching tele in bed with the light off (I actually watched a really good programme about the cocaine manufacturing biz in Peru which kinda took my mind off worrying about my loneliness). Tuesday morning was a struggle but I only worked a half day - I had a date with Dr Anxiety in the afternoon.
The appointment was alright. I had hoped she would diagnose me with some rare mental problem, prescribe me with some strong mood stabilisers and send me on my way. She didn't. Instead I confessed my biggest worry to her and she set me some tasks from a booklet to work through and we've arranged a call for a couple of weeks. My session with her kinda made me realise even more that no one else really gives a shit. I'm not being all negative and depressive, I am merely pointing out the facts; no one can sort my head out apart from myself and it's in no ones interest too apart from my own. That's why when I'm feeling all moody (which by the way she says is totally normal, I've got to stop expecting to be all cheery all the time) I've got to deal with it on my own and in a healthy way. I think I am getting better at that, hence my locking myself away in my room with the tele. I did ask her why some mornings I wake up with this cloud floating over my head, she said that sometimes we carry around negative thoughts from the day before that we haven't yet dealt with. Interesting stuff.
Anyhoo, I hung out with a friend on Tuesday night. It was nice. Sometimes it's good to hang out with different people, learn new stuff about people, it helps to think about things differently. I drunk red wine and ate freshly baked cookies. It was a pretty delicious evening.
By Wednesday things were looking up, hump day really helps to boost the mood. I had good day yesterday too. Last night I met up with some old school friends. I have been hanging out with these guys for ten years. I have never had beef (or sexual relations) with any of them; they are simply the easiest group of friends. I definitely get on better with guys. If they have the hump they say then and there, you argue about it, have a little laugh and all is well again in the world of man. Why do women make this so goddam hard? My evening last night consisted of chilli burritos, talks of tattoos and a very cute baby. It was lovely. Nothing better than a catch up with old mates to make you feel grounded.
And that brings me to Friday. What a nice mood to start the weekend in eh? I've got plans this weekend too. I am speeding down to Gloucestershire in the morning to party like a pirate for my cousins son's 4th birthday party. I'm hoping to celebrate proper pirate style too later on in the evening, with lots of booze and easy women at every port (perhaps I took that too far).
To conclude my update, right at this very minute I feel good. I feel content in the moment. Roll on 5:30 and the sneaky cider before heading home (I've got work drinks, I am not planning a brown paper bag job on the train journey home).
Anyhoo, I hung out with a friend on Tuesday night. It was nice. Sometimes it's good to hang out with different people, learn new stuff about people, it helps to think about things differently. I drunk red wine and ate freshly baked cookies. It was a pretty delicious evening.
By Wednesday things were looking up, hump day really helps to boost the mood. I had good day yesterday too. Last night I met up with some old school friends. I have been hanging out with these guys for ten years. I have never had beef (or sexual relations) with any of them; they are simply the easiest group of friends. I definitely get on better with guys. If they have the hump they say then and there, you argue about it, have a little laugh and all is well again in the world of man. Why do women make this so goddam hard? My evening last night consisted of chilli burritos, talks of tattoos and a very cute baby. It was lovely. Nothing better than a catch up with old mates to make you feel grounded.
And that brings me to Friday. What a nice mood to start the weekend in eh? I've got plans this weekend too. I am speeding down to Gloucestershire in the morning to party like a pirate for my cousins son's 4th birthday party. I'm hoping to celebrate proper pirate style too later on in the evening, with lots of booze and easy women at every port (perhaps I took that too far).
To conclude my update, right at this very minute I feel good. I feel content in the moment. Roll on 5:30 and the sneaky cider before heading home (I've got work drinks, I am not planning a brown paper bag job on the train journey home).
