It's been nearly four months since Mr Boy broke up with me in my kitchen, out of the blue, on a random Thursday night. Since I last posted I have completed #100DaysOfHappiness, lost more weight (some people actually describing me as skinny!) and I have started to see a councillor. My new focus is me. I'm trying to get good sleep, watch the alcohol intake and be kind to myself. I've been spending time with friends and family, watching movies and generally enjoying having my house to myself.
Over the last week or so I've actually caught up with a couple of friends I haven't spoken to for a while.
My relationship with the Uni girls is a little complicated but we've been friends nearly ten years. We lived together when were just learning what it's like to be an adult, we've shared many a boy problem and many drunken nights. Whilst in Manchester those three years, these girls were my family. In general I do feel in quite a different stage of my life compared to them. They are really settling down and looking forward to their near distance future of babies and marriages. I suppose it's fair to say I've been reluctant to explain to them my latest relationship break up, especially after telling them nothing but good things whilst I was with Mr Boy.
Last night I caught up with one of them for post-work drinks. It turned out to be really good to talk the past 6 months through with her. Both my Uni girls were surprised when I told them my story - that always helps me to see that it was ok in being shocked too. My friend last night said it was a shame I had invested all that time and effort into something that ended so abruptly - she hit the nail on the head. I explained that at least I've learnt some lessons about guys, her response was 'yea, like you didn't know all that before'. Again, totally right - I've met my fair share of unreliable dudes.
I apologise for still to be rambling on about this four months on. One big worry of mine is that people think I should be over all this by now, that I should be like 'Mr Boy who?' and already be on to the next. I'm sure a few of my friends think that what I had with him isn't anything to miss, especially as some of my friends are dealing with breakups where they were planning their future with these dudes; but the trouble is you just can't help how you feel. If I could I would definitely not still be thinking about it all.
He really hurt me and it takes time to get your head around all that. I'm getting there though.
