Having a crush is bitter sweet.
A friend of mine split up with a very long term boyfriend nearly two years ago. I am sure she won't mind me saying that she struggled getting over him and that only recently has she started to get involved with new boys. She has also developed a little crush on her boss.I know, very cliche, especially as he is engaged to someone else. Crushing on unavailable people is very common when your attempting to get over someone, when perhaps your feeling a bit low on the self confidence front. Your crush being with someone else is the perfect excuse not to act on your feelings and risk getting hurt all over again.This crushing on your boss thing is quite common. I know another
friend who claims she is 'in love' with her boss and has been for quite
some time, who again is involved with someone else.
I am naive in most things, but I think I am quite realistic when it comes to relationships. Recently I have realised that being in a long term relationship, whether it be 5 years or 35 years, doesn't mean you will never have feelings for anyone else ever again. Just because you have committed yourself to this other person cannot prevent you coming across someone else you have strong feelings for. The crushing is not an issue, it is kind of inevitable, but its how you deal with it or react to it which can lead to all sorts of issues. Obviously I am writing from a single status point of view and do not claim to be a relationship expert whatsoever.
To flip this on its head, another friend of mine is in a long term relationship and sometimes participates in FB flirting with someone they met nearly ten years ago. It is just FB flirting and they tell me their partner is well aware of it.
Crushes are fantasies. I am a big day dreamer and love nothing more than fantasising about all sorts of situations and relationships. For some people it's a distraction from day-to-day boredom and perhaps even relationship boredom, but in reality these crushes or fantasies may not only work out well but may not meet your high expectations either.
To conclude, in my opinion keep your crush just as that; a fantasy.
